Flight of Death

A little "fun" experience I had on my recent flight to the UK...

We had just boarded the aircraft at Incheon International - South Korea. Now, the people who are in the seats next to you are going to be next to you for the next 9 hours or so. Therefore it's worth your while to be amicable - I'm all about the quick friendly chit-chat as you are trying to get organised in your little airplane seat.

At this point (five minutes into meeting my airline companion, I have realised that this is way beyond  quick pre-take-off small talk. I know his name, his family, his occupation, all the languages he speaks, his cultural heritage, his university studies, his travels in Korea, his view on Obama and his aversion to spicy food. We have not even taken off yet.)

Decide to employ subtle tactic of "pretend to be deeply interested in something else".

Pull out iPhone:

Ok. Clearly iPhone technique is not working. Put iPhone away. Decide to be "deeply engaged" in the inflight entertainment book. As in "I'm-sorry-I-can't-really-talk-right-now-I'm-kind-of-busy".

Decide to turn head 90' and look out the window.

New friend: WOW! blonde hair! So, is your mom blonde too?! Oh cool! pink streak in your hair! I bet your mom doesn't have a pink streak in her hair! Or does she have pink streak in her hair? I don't know!

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We had taken off and I decided the best way to deal with overzealousness of new friend was just to fall asleep. I did give a warning.

me: um... hey, i'm gonna try fall asleep right now.... I'm gonna take these little pills and they are hopefully going to put me into a deep deep sleep.

new friend: OK! no problem! I will just keep talking until you fall asleep!

me: um.. well.  I'm not going to reply to any questions or anything... cause... I'm going to be trying to sleep. You know what I mean?

New friend: No problem!

(yip. this conversation happened.)

i struggle to fall asleep on planes.

DON'T DO THIS.

(more like "YES?! WTF GUY?! WHY DID YOU WAKE ME?!?")

Take wretched details to save myself three more hours of "banter". Try unsuccessfully to fall asleep. Toss, turn, scratch, fight chair, smash pillow, bang head against window, smack shins against chair, curse, get tangled in blanket, hit elbow into armrest, crack neck, put feet on chair, put feet on armrest, put feet on window, put feet behind ears. Get pins and needles. Finally get some sort of "rest"

Sleeping on a plane is NOT easy for me and

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we have now landed in Dubai"

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 THE END 

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Ps. you think I make this stuff up?

I don't.